Frustrated? I'm Always Irritable, Frustrated
“I’m always irritable, frustrated. I’m done with this!“
I hear this every day in my counseling practice. People are so exhausted, frustrated, filled with irritability, so if you’re reading this and you feel this way you are not alone.
And remember the first step is to change awareness, but awareness on its own does nothing until we put action steps in it to change whatever that awareness is.
So what is causing all this irritability? Anger? Frustration?
Let’s look at a few factors:
Number One. Isolation and disruption from our normal lifestyle. For the last three years, this has been the mantra of the world. What we’ve known as “regular life“, has been turned upside down.
When human beings, without really exceptional emotional coping skills, go through such a radical change in their lifestyle, in their finances, with their health, with the relationship issues that we’ve seen during the pandemic… We resort to almost primal responses, don’t we?
And how many of us were ever taught the correct emotional coping skills for three years of isolation? Or three years of constant arguing in the political spectrum? Or three years of arguing with friends, who are no longer friends?
Number Two. Feeling out of control. This is one of the quickest ways that we get irritable and frustrated. We feel that we don’t have control over many of the choices that we used to make in life.
As a personal example, when my father died several months ago, because of the rules in New York State where they asked you to prove that you were Covid free before you board the plane, and then every 72 hours you had to take a test to prove that you still were Covid free, it created a frustrated response inside of me, because I sure as heck did not want to get stuck in quarantine in New York when in actuality I just wanted to be with my father!
So what did I do? I dropped my frustration, rented a car, and drove from Florida to New York and back so that I could be with my father after he passed, be with my family at the funeral and so it was a case of me using strong emotional coping techniques to let go of the frustration.
Solutions, are what we’re looking for, not constant arguing or complaining, solutions are proof that we are working with emotional control or emotional regulation.
Number Three. The constant changing of rules and regulations can drive us to frustration and anger pretty quickly.
And this has happened all over the country. While some states shut down hard several times, other states stayed fairly open, which could lead to great resentment from the people living in the states that were coming through with extremely hard shut down rules.
I have no interest in taking sides here. I will never debate politics. I’m just stating the truth: it would be like having a younger brother that could stay out till midnight, but you have to be in at 9 PM.
You’ve lost control. And you’re seeing someone else having liberties that you do not have.
Do you see how that would create ongoing frustration?
I think the key is to start really focusing on emotional regulation. Do I have to really respond to that person in traffic who just cut me off?
Do I have to stand in the gym talking to someone about how they’re so angry at the former president or the current president?
Does it help my level of frustration and anxiety to watch the news every day?
Does it help my anxiety and frustration by arguing on social media?
I think we all know the answers to these questions, but are you willing to change?
For those who are willing to change, you will start to see a dramatic decrease in your irritability and frustration with yourself, the people around you, and the world.
The great news? All of this is 100% in your control. If you need help, reach out to a professional, I can be contacted at https://www.davidessel.com.“
David Essel‘s work is highly endorsed by individuals like the late Wayne Dyer, and celebrity Jenny McCarthy says, “David Essel is the new leader of the positive thinking movement.“
His new program, “Helping Americans Heal“, is absolutely free! When you sign up you’ll instantly get a copy of his number one best-selling book, “positive thinking“, and every week you’ll receive an email with tools to help you learn powerful emotional regulation techniques.
His work as a counselor and minister has been verified, by so many organizations like Psychology Today, Therapy Tribe, Theravive, and marriage.com has verified David is one of the top counselors and relationship experts in the world.
To work with David one on one from anywhere, simply visit https://www.davidessel.com.
To read more articles on relationship try this one… Pandemic and Intimacy
